Oh crap! The girl I met online finally said yes to a face-to-face date! What do I do??

Well, first of all, relax. Yeah, for sure she’s one of those hot single Russian ladies we see all over the web. But here’s the thing about you being all nervous: she liked your profile too, and she also enjoyed chatting with you–otherwise this wouldn’t have gone any further than the Russian dating websites where you met.
So if it’s gone this far, it means you already have several topics to talk about, things you already asked her about like movies, music, books, ideas. This might sound cheesy, but before going on your date, you might scroll back through your previous chats and jot down some of the topics you discussed. If you simultaneously chat up several beautiful Russian ladies at once–guilty!–then this is really an essential component of your date preparation. There is nothing more embarrassing than bringing up a fun or interesting previous topic of discussion with your date only to find out that it was some other potential Russian bride you were talking with about that! (Also, guilty…trust me, that was an awkward moment I do NOT want to repeat!)

Now this one might seem like a no-brainer, but you’d be surprised at how many guys out there behave as though they have no brains when it comes to dating Russian women: dress as though you are meeting a girl you are interested in impressing, fool! You can go one night leaving that filthy, sweat-stained Red Sox hat at home, champ. Come on.

Look, dating in Russia is different than dating in your country, no matter where you live. That’s the thing about adventurous fellows like us: we are out to discover the differences and enjoy them. That means trying to understand those differences and minimize any awkwardness as much as possible. One way to do this is to dress a little bit nicer than you think you should. You don’t need to sport bling like you’re a millionaire, but putting a little effort into your look can go a long way.

I also recommend making a real effort to know the place where you’re taking her, or if you don’t know the place, at the very least I would check it out online. Another pro move is to make sure you get there well before her. This is for two reasons: you want to be there when she comes in so you can make a good impression, rather than rolling in late and sweating and frantically looking for her. The second reason is so you can know the layout of the place, have a server or bartender already aware of you and looking after you, and generally being relaxed and comfortable.

And this last tip is another no-brainer, but one that so many people forget or ignore: pay attention to her. No matter if you’re dating a Russian super-model or your wife of 20 years, everyone wants to know that we’re listening. Eye-contact, actually listening to what she’s saying, commenting on what she says, asking questions–all of these are important.

But here’s a freebie for you: if you’re nervous, one of the best ways to get over it is to really, really focus on the other person. This is an old actor’s trick: the minute you’re fully engaged and focused on what the other person is saying, who are you no longer paying attention to? Yourself. The cause of all your self-doubt is being focused on yourself. Stop it!

So this is my best piece of advice for taking your first step outside of the online Russian dating pool and into the ocean of face to face meetings: focus on her, her likes her dislikes, what makes her happy, what makes her laugh.

And don’t forget to have fun!